For most of us, public speaking isn’t easy, and if your friend or loved one asks you to deliver a speech at their wedding, it may be a bit scary. However, the great honor of speaking at their wedding can be a beautiful experience that you and all those in attendance will remember forever. If you prepare ahead of time, you can be the one who nails the toast and impresses the bride, groom, and the room full of their guests that you may or may not have met before this gathering. If you have found yourself stuck trying to write the perfect speech that is equally heartfelt as it is entertaining, here are some tips to help!

It can be helpful to start off the writing process by listing out some of your favorite memories of the bride and/or groom, what you admire about them as a couple (and as individuals), and why they make such a great pair. Listing these ideas can get the brainstorming process flowing in full swing before you start writing out the speech.

Once you have gathered your stories and other thoughts for your speech, you can start putting it together. A good time frame for your speech is 2-5 minutes; any longer and you might begin to lose your audience. Plus, yours is most likely not the only speech of the day! A nice speech should include the following:

1) Introduction: Chances are not everyone in the room knows who you are or what your relationship to the bride and groom is, so take a moment to introduce yourself. This is an important part of any speech you may give as it will give your audience context and will ultimately make your speech more well-received.

2) Words of Thanks: Before you get into your speech, this would be a good time to acknowledge and thank the hosts, members of the wedding party, and anyone else who had a hand making the wedding happen! It may also be nice to thank guests for traveling from near and far to be a part of the newlywed’s special day.

Lastly, you can take this time to officially congratulate and share your well-wishes with the bride and groom since they are the whole reason for the celebration and your speech.

3) Get Personal: Since you were asked to deliver a speech, you must have a close relationship and connection with one or both of the newlyweds; this is your time to share stories about your friend or loved one that will give your speech a personal and heartfelt touch. Guests will enjoy hearing these stories, especially since it can help those who only know one half of the couple to get to know the other! Keep in mind, this is not a good time to embarrass the couple by sharing stories that they probably don’t want their family members and friends hearing about on their special day. Remember, there is funny and there is embarrassing — ask yourself what you would want to hear in a speech at your own wedding.

When working on this part of your speech, look back on your brainstorming ideas and write from the heart!

4) Address and Praise Both Partners: Now, you can bring your speech back to what the day is all about– their relationship and celebrating their marriage. You should be addressing both of the newlyweds at this point; that means that even if you’ve only met one half of the couple once or twice before the wedding, you should find a way to include them in your toast!

5) Toast: You should wrap up your speech by inviting guests to raise their glasses to the happy couple. You can also include any final wishes or quotes that you wish to share.

Now that your speech is written, it’s time to practice! You should rehearse your speech as much as you can until you feel comfortable and confident with the material and your delivery. It’s also totally acceptable to have notecards or a written speech to follow, but try not to rely on those too heavily. Allow yourself to enjoy the moment and speak naturally when the time to deliver your speech comes.

Try not to stress too much about your speech, you’ll do great if you prepare ahead of time! Remember, you were asked to speak because you are a special person in the lives of the newlyweds and they want to hear your meaningful thoughts and wishes for them, so take the honor and make the most of the opportunity.

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